Event Drama & How to Diffuse It

I was recently at a lovely spa hotel, the kind with soft music, herbal tea, and a salt scrub that promised to melt the stress away. Except, post-treatment, I discovered the shower had barely enough water pressure to rinse a fingertip, let alone a salt-covered body. It reminded me that even the most serene settings can turn tense when expectations aren’t met — a truth event planners know all too well. We’ve all been through it one way or another, right? So this week, I’m diving into the art of mitigating conflict at events — from the bizarre to the frustrating — and share how we can turn chaos into calm.

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You never forget your first big conflict as an event planner. Mine happened nearly 30 years ago, when a delegate cornered me and demanded to know if I had deliberately booked him into a … bordello.

Yes — a bordello.

Now, for the record, the hotel was a four-star property, well-maintained and reputable and with easy access to the convention center where the conference was being held. It was located in a bustling nightlife district, where a few bars with neon signs and suggestive names lined the nearby streets, but it was not, by any means, a house of ill repute. Still, perception is everything. He was livid, and in that moment, logic wasn’t going to change his mind.

That day, I learned one of the most important truths of event planning: you can do everything right and still end up in conflict — the key is how you respond.

More recently, I found myself on the other side of that equation. I’d just had a glorious spa treatment at a resort — salt scrub, oils, the whole ritual. But when I returned to my room to rinse off, the shower had almost no water pressure. Imagine trying to remove a thick layer of salt with a gentle trickle of lukewarm water. I was frustrated. I called reception and filed a complaint.

And in that moment, I remembered how it feels to be the guest — uncomfortable, slightly embarrassed, just wanting someone to fix it.

Conflict is inevitable. But mitigation? That’s an art — one that starts before the complaint even arises.

Here are five situations that often lead to conflict at events — some preventable, some not — and how best to handle them with grace and authority.

1. The Misspelled Name Badge

A speaker arrives to find their name misspelled on both their badge and the welcome signage. It may seem minor, but to them, it signals a lack of attention and respect.

What to do: First, own the mistake. Apologize sincerely. “I’m so sorry — we missed this in the final proof, and that’s on us.” Then, fix it fast. Have an on-site badge reprint station ready for these moments. For signage, print a discreet name overlay or remove the sign if you must. Follow up with a handwritten note or small token of appreciation later — a coffee voucher, a personalized thank-you card. These little gestures help reaffirm their value.

2. The Tech Breakdown During a Keynote

It’s every event planner’s nightmare: the keynote speaker steps up, and the microphone cuts out. The slides don’t load. The clicker doesn’t work. The room tenses, and the speaker loses momentum.

What to do: Prevention is key — conduct tech run-throughs and have a dedicated AV technician on standby. Yes it’s an additional cost, but well worth it. But when it still happens live - and it can, stay calm and act quickly. Brief your emcee in advance to step in with light banter if there's a delay. “Looks like the tech gods are testing us — while we sort this out, let’s take a deep breath and maybe stretch our legs for 30 seconds!” Humor and calm energy can reset the room. Reassure the speaker and get things back on track as smoothly as possible. Then, follow up privately to thank them for their patience and composure.

3. The Protest That Blocks the VIP Entrance

A last-minute protest erupts near your venue. Streets are blocked. Your panel of VIPs is stuck in traffic, with no clear route to the event. Guests are waiting.

What to do: Monitor local events and news in the days leading up to your event — especially if your venue is in a politically active district. Always have an alternate route mapped out and communicated to key personnel. If the VIPs can't make it in time, pivot: move their session later in the program if possible, or arrange a virtual connection if they're willing to join from their cars. Then, clearly communicate the delay to attendees. “Our keynote panel is facing unexpected traffic delays. We’re reshuffling the program slightly and thank you for your understanding.” Transparency builds trust.

4. The Dinner That Goes Wrong for Dietary Reasons

Despite collecting dietary requirements, your vegan guest is presented with… a plain salad. No protein, no starch. Just leaves. They’re disappointed and feel overlooked.

What to do: Work closely with caterers to ensure that dietary needs are met with thoughtful, well-rounded meals — not afterthoughts. On the night, have a staff member designated to liaise between kitchen and guests. If something goes wrong, respond quickly. “I’m so sorry, that’s not what we intended. Let me speak to the chef and get you something proper right away.” Acknowledge the oversight, and offer a gesture — a special dessert, or a thank-you note the next day. People remember how they were made to feel.

5. The Misunderstood Venue

You book a hotel that ticks all the boxes — clean, reputable, convenient. But a guest perceives it differently due to its surroundings. This was exactly what happened with the “bordello” incident.

What to do: Context matters. If your venue is in an area with nightlife or red-light activity, be upfront when briefing delegates. Include transport info, highlight nearby conveniences, and be transparent about the vibe. In my case, mitigation came in the form of the female head of the organization. Calmly and with quiet authority, she told the delegate, “I’m staying at the same hotel. It’s absolutely fine.” That one sentence did what my long explanations couldn’t — it defused the situation instantly. Sometimes, credibility and composure are the best tools you have.

Final Thought: Conflict Is Inevitable — Drama Is Optional

Whether it's a spa guest with salt on her skin or a speaker with the wrong name, everyone wants to feel heard and respected. As planners, our job is to manage not just the logistics, but the emotions that come with live events. Conflict doesn’t mean failure. It’s simply an invitation to show what you’re made of — with empathy, clarity, and a touch of grace.

Come on — we’ve all been through the wars. What’s your “bordello story”? The weird complaint, the impossible delegate, the moment that tested your event-day zen. Tell us how you defused it — battle scars and all.

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